Pain in the Journey

Pain is inevitable in a journey that changes you is what I have come to understand. It seems since this journey began in my life in May 2007 almost every aspect of my life has been affected and is changing. Relationships are in particular the hardest part to accept. It is not easy to change and it definitely not easy to let go of things. A wise person told me in the beginning of all of this that you can not force people to go on a journey with you. You can offer yourself and your heart but you can not force people to go along. I understand that in my head but it has been very difficult to live it out! I guess I really thought that not this much would change and that it would not be as hard on my friendships and my family. Things are changing and I am changing. I feel like I am being led more than ever by the Holy Spirit in my life. I have lived as a Christian a long time but I have not been this close to God in a long time, much too long! I have played a good church game and kept a good church face for most of my life but now...it is Real for me! I am actually hearing the Spirit lead me. Pain does not feel good, it hurts deeply for people to turn away from you, but I do trust my God that he has a plan. I read in James 1 :3 today about trials. I have read this verse so many times but today it STUCK..."trials (testing of your faith) produces endurance but endurance must do its complete work so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. " This spoke to me today because I see May 2007 as the testing of my faith and that produces endurance...this phase I am in now is endurance (the long road)! I know by enduring, God is maturing me and completing me and I will lack nothing!

Just my thoughts today!