The Sabbath

Well, today is Sunday...In our culture the day we are suppose to go to church. I have been struggling with this tradition for a while but I am seeking God's guidance as to what I am to do with it! I started reading a book, "The Early Church" by Henry Chadwick, in my search to discover how the church started and how we ended up where we are today. It is a great book with a lot of information. I consider myself a fast reader but this is a book that takes some time to comprehend! It is not that I do not ever want to attend church, it is that I want to know why I am there and if I am in the place God has called me to be. I have never in my Christian walk asked God where I should go to church. I have always attended a particular denomination because that is how I was raised. I was told that was the "right way." Now, as I have matured in my spiritual walk, I am beginning to see that one denomination is not better than another. It doesn't get you to Heaven faster or closer to Christ quicker. Denominations are simply preferences to how you worship Christ. The only way to Heaven is belief in Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour. Throughout the gospels, Jesus repeatedly says He is the Son of God and belief in Him is the only way to God. He mentions nothing about dividing the church into denominations. I am all for finding a place I feel that I can worship Christ and it is a fit for me, but when I find myself judging other believers for their style of worshiping the same Christ then I need to check my own heart. We will all worship together one day in Heaven and who knows what that will look like!! So maybe we need to be more open minded to others styles of worship! Now, my struggle is this... I have tasted the depth of relationships and it is becoming very hard for me to be surface with people so I don't want to waste my time doing activities that are surface, including church! I want to go to church for the sole reason to worship my God and Jesus His Son. I don't want to be the church lady- involved in activities up to my head but none of them for the right reasons. Believe me, I have been there and it is not fulfilling. When I do stuff for myself and none of it is for my relationship with Christ. I want to serve everyone God puts in my path. People in the world are hurting and have needs and they have been so turned off by church you will not find them there, so I need to pay attention to who God is putting in my path and reach out when The Spirit is telling me too. I have a strong belief that we would not find Jesus in church on Sunday! I think He would be out healing, ministering, loving the broken, hurt, sick people in the world!! Now...what do I do with my struggle...I am seeking God and I don't have an answer right now, so I am waiting......

Quote for Today

"You must take personal responsibility. You cannot change the circumstances, the seasons, or the wind, but you can change yourself" - Jim Rohn

How appropiate for me today!

Pain in the Journey

Pain is inevitable in a journey that changes you is what I have come to understand. It seems since this journey began in my life in May 2007 almost every aspect of my life has been affected and is changing. Relationships are in particular the hardest part to accept. It is not easy to change and it definitely not easy to let go of things. A wise person told me in the beginning of all of this that you can not force people to go on a journey with you. You can offer yourself and your heart but you can not force people to go along. I understand that in my head but it has been very difficult to live it out! I guess I really thought that not this much would change and that it would not be as hard on my friendships and my family. Things are changing and I am changing. I feel like I am being led more than ever by the Holy Spirit in my life. I have lived as a Christian a long time but I have not been this close to God in a long time, much too long! I have played a good church game and kept a good church face for most of my life but now...it is Real for me! I am actually hearing the Spirit lead me. Pain does not feel good, it hurts deeply for people to turn away from you, but I do trust my God that he has a plan. I read in James 1 :3 today about trials. I have read this verse so many times but today it STUCK..."trials (testing of your faith) produces endurance but endurance must do its complete work so that you may be mature and complete, lacking nothing. " This spoke to me today because I see May 2007 as the testing of my faith and that produces endurance...this phase I am in now is endurance (the long road)! I know by enduring, God is maturing me and completing me and I will lack nothing!

Just my thoughts today!

My First Day

Today is the first day I will begin to blog about my journey. My journey to discover ME. For most of my life I have just gone along with the flow of things and not really known if I like or dislike something. I had a chance to spend a weekend with some amazing Wise Women and was encouraged to discover my likes and dislikes. So, this is the beginning of discovering myself. What drives me, what do I Really like to do or not do, my passions, my discovery of new things, and how this journey has changed me into the woman I am today and the woman I am becoming!